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Seriously, no one understands me at all.. No one.. And i just don't understand some people too.. I just want to be happy.. Is that too much for me to ask? But for them to grant me that slight happiness seems to be the hardest thing on earth.. Sometimes, i just wish that they would actually think about me but it seems i am non-existent.. I never wanted to be invisible..

No matter what i do now, i'll never be happy.. I force myself to be happy but i just ended up hurting myself and the people around me.. Looking back in the past, i do regret some of my actions.. But what's the point? I'm already where i am now.. I can't turn back time.. All i can do is learn from my mistakes..

Honestly, i'm not a very strong person.. I've always had pillars supporting me but one by one, they crumble down.. I was so confident that i could still carry on with just a pillar.. I pin all my hopes on this very last pillar that i could lean on.. All my hopes.. All my faith.. But he just disappoint me..

I don't have the courage to start life afresh.. Because i can never let go.. I keep holding on to the past.. What i'm doing now is just rebuilding those pillars..

I need a shoulder to cry on.. I need an arm to lean on.. I need a hand to hold on.. I need a lead to carry on.. I need an advice to move on..

I just want my old friends back..

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